An action??? What do I mean? It is clear when I was painting hearts on my cheeks and sprinkling myself with glitter, that my “vibe” was “Peace, Love and Understanding” of everyone, no matter, gay, straight or whatever. This was my message, even if I did not quite realize it myself at the time.
As I got older and cut my hair, and wore black, and pogo’d at the local clubs….I was saying I am free. To be me. I do not care what your fucking “ideas” say I “should be. I will sleep with who I want to, as many as I want to, and you will not make me “feel bad” about doing so. After all, it was a notch in a man’s belt, why not mine. And still, I want to be me, not your idea of me.I will be wild and strong and you will see me.
Amidst these “periods” of my life, I was, also, always the person in the room, in the neighborhood, in the grocery line, who talked to the “old” people around me. I could see an isolation they were experiencing, that I was unfamiliar with, and one I did not, for some reason, want them to experience. I chatted. I patted them on the shoulder, sometimes we even exchanged numbers. Some became my clients (massage therapy) and some just my friends. I helped others to organize, or get around, or just simply wipe the corners of their mouths, so they would not be embarrassed.
And now, I find I am “that” person. Today, two days before my 66 birthday, I was ignored, pushed out of the way, and simply treated like I did not exist in the room.
Take that in. And understand, if it has not happened to you yet, it will one day, and you too will think back and remember what you might have done or said. I write this not for pity, or kind words or even because I want you to feel bad…..I simply write this to ask you to remember that one day, you too will be old and feeble and need the help of those younger folks around you.
Hopefully you can garnish enough respect in your family and community, that you will have those you need. Even when those present, are in a rush, and on to the nest thing.
I sort of feel like, knowing this now, will only help lead to that most fortunate future. We are all young and beautiful at some moment.
This was me at 30. this is me at 65.
Still a beauty of my world and my kingdom. Yet older, and more vulnerable, whether I want to admit it or not. I remember to, embrace every moment…….and love all those I come in contact with. No matter…….WHAT!!! And I hope you will too!!!
Until next time, Cynthia @ MoonMaid